The Just Live by Faith

Well, once again, I'm feeling really down about the adoption. Let me be more clear, not the adoption, but the TIMELINE of the adoption. I know you've all heard me say it before... we expected to be home with our daughter Christmas 07. Ha!
I thought once we accepted Jia's referral it would be better, and it was for a while. I had things to do. Gather dossier documents... again, check. Get everything notarized, certified and authenticated... again, check. Go through the homestudy... again, check. Drive the social worker nuts until she completes the homestudy... again, check.
You get the picture, I had things to accomplish, checks to write, people to politely call, daily... But once everything was submitted to CCAA... again, there was nothing I could do to 'push' the process. It is totally out of my hands and all I can do is.... wait. Ugh.
I never really thought of my self as a control freak... I mean I do 'prefer' the dishwasher loaded a certain way, the towels folded a certain way, the van pulled into the garage at a certain angle... (hmmm!!!) As long as I had some 'control' over the process, I was good. But now... well you get the picture!
Anyway, I was reading in my bible tonight and ran across a favorite verse in Habakkuk.
For the vision is yet for an appointed time; But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie. Though it taries, wait for it, Because is will surely come, It will not tarry. Habakkuk 2:3
An appointed time speaks of a determined time in God's eyes, not mine. God knows His plan and how it will all work out according to His purpose. The fullfillment of the vision will not take any longer than God has planned all along.

Why is it so hard to give up control, or better yet, realize I'm not in control. Oh, I may think I am, but I'm forgetting Who really is. I'm not trusting Him, His plan, purpose or timing. Although His Word tells me His way is perfect, I want it my way. Do I want to wait for perfection? Or do I want to settle for less?
I am human though, and the thought of Jia still in the orphanage, not having someone hold her, love her, teach her, touch her, play with her etc... it breaks my heart. I know how blessed I am with my family now and I don't mean to discount that. But I also feel a real pain from wanting my daughter home. Each day she misses out on her family and we miss out on her. I feel stuck, not complete. I want to move forward, but I feel like I'm on pause.
I'm sure once the weather warms up, we can get outside, the boys will start baseball... the time will go by more quickly. I know it will all be worth it when I finally hold her. I know in the grand scheme of things, this is just a bleep on the radar... but that doesn't make it any easier right now.
People are so kind and always ask if we know something, but it just serves as a reminder that, unfortunately we don't. It's just hard, it stinks.
Maybe I'll write out that verse and put it on my bathroom mirror. Oh, and at my desk at work. And probably in my car would be good to...
Now I think I'll go listen to that awesome song by John Waller from Fireproof... Worship While I'm Waiting...

40 Days Waiting for LOA

He heard my cry...

Wait on the LORD; Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the LORD! Psalm 27:14

I waited patiently for the LORD; And He inclined to me,

And heard my cry. Psalm 40:1

The LORD is good to those who wait for Him,

To the soul who seeks Him. Lamentations 3:25

Yesterday started out as such a low day. LOA's usually come in on Monday's and many people were announcing their good news. There are some days I feel like I'll wait forever. Each step has always taken longer than I originally thought it should.

In the beginning, we were told 8 - 10 months. I thought I'd be home with my daughter by Christmas 2007!!! Boy was I wrong! So anyway... you get the picture! Some days are so hard. To barrow the line from Facing the Giants... "I keep asking myself how I can miss someone so much that I've never even met."

Then at lunch time my friend Sherri showed up at work and we got to have lunch together at Huckleberry's! She has been in Texas taking care of her parents since the first of December, and her dad recently passed away. It was so good to see her and spend time with her. She brought gifts for Jia, but unfortunately I left them at work and don't have pictures to post.

When I got home, I had this lovely little box from my new friend Aimee! Aimee and her husband are adopting a little girl from the same orphanage as Jia! So right now, Jia and Caiya are sista's! Aimee had made matching dresses for the girls and also included some adorable barrettes and a quilt square for Jia's 100 Good Wishes Quilt. Although Caiya will live in SC, she has family in S MO, so the next time they're close we are totally getting together! It has been glorious getting to know Aimee and I look forward to sharing many stories about our daughters in the future!
Aimee- your gift really cheered me up and thank you so much! I can't wait to bless you in return!

Here's my quilt square and sqwish from Aimee and Caiya!

Here is the dress that Aimee made for Jia. Isn't it just beautiful?! I love the toile fabric and simply can't wait to see Jia in this!

Check out the hem!!!!!! What a seamstress!

Another bow! I just can't wait! I am praying for an opportunity to get a photo of Jia and Caiya in their matching dresses! Oh how I wish it were in China, as Aimee and her husband already have their LOA and tenative travel dates for May. (sigh)

Anyway... I believe God heard my cry and gave me some encouragement. I will wait patiently upon Him. I know His ways and His timing is perfect.

Happy Birthday Dr. Olswing

Today was Dr. Olswings birthday so I made Pioneer Womans cake balls for the occasion!

Grant it they don't look nearly as adorable as PW,

but they tasted very good!

To make the cake balls, first you make a cake! After it's baked and cooled, you crumble it up and mix in a tub of frosting. Then refridgerate it until it's firm enough to roll into balls. I did this last weekend and then froze my cake balls.

PW used a little plastic candy mold to make hers.. well here in N Mo, those aren't readily available... so I used my mini muffin tin. Rather than them being bite size... they require 2 bites!

Here are the cake balls after being put in the chocolate in the mini muffin tins.

Next you dip them in the white chocolate, sprinkle some sprinkles on them and top with an M&M.

When Dr. Olswing walked in and seen them on her desk she squealed "ARE THESE BAKARELLA'S?" Apparently, I"m not the only PW follower in our office!
I think she liked them! Happy Birthday!


Check back tomorrow to see the contents of a special package I got in the mail today!

FCCLA Daffodil Days

Jadeth's FCCLA group sold daffodils all over town today to raise $$ for the American Cancer Society. His group of kids was set up at Pamida and there were others at HyVee and I don't know where else.

So anyway, I dragged my self out of bed on Saturday morning to go buy daffodils! Over all, Jadeth said they raised over $400! Way to go guys!